Time and a Season

Ecclesiastes 3:1

"To every thing there is a season, and a time

to every purpose under the heaven..."

 

Mosiah 4:27

"And see that all these things are done in wisdom and order; for it is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength. And again, it is expedient that he should be diligent, that thereby he might win the prize; therefore, all things must be done in order."

We had an amazing re-inspiration lesson (we know it, we just need refocused at times) in Relief Society today.  We discussed the importance of being physically, spiritually, mentally, and emotionally healthy.

During the course of our fascinating discussion about trying to do just as much as everyone else despite any lack of current ability/time, given present circumstances, vs. not feeling like we had to do and be everything right now (you know, the ever-present societal lie that we are not worth our salt or pulling our weight if we aren't employed at least part-time and the PTO President and making cookies for a primary class every week and volunteering somewhere and... you get the idea)... anyway, the first scripture I mentioned came to mind.  One thing about women, is that we do want to do and be everything.  We desire perfection or at least something that resembles it.  Neither of those things are necessarily bad.  Unfortunately, we compare ourselves to everyone else and the image in our head or in the pages of a magazine of what perfect looks like (which is usually far from realistic).  We let the false world idea invade our self-worth and plant the seeds that tell us we are lacking, failing, less than, incompetent, and worse.  We can talk ourselves out of being capable of things, or into running faster than we can walk (see the second scripture).  These are bad.  These are opposite of who we are as daughters of God, and who our Father would have us be.  It is the opposite of our limitless, capable, royal true selves.

These two scriptures teach us a lot about moderation, gratitude, happiness, patience, and self-worth.

Moderation:

Balance is what this skill brings.  I am reminded of the children's story of The Three Bears when Baby Bear finds the best to be "just right," and these are somewhere in the middle, not too much and not too little of whatever he is seeking.  Extreme is rarely healthy.  Not doing nearly enough is an extreme and prevents growth.  Doing too much is an obvious extreme and reduces the ability to do your best.  Personal revelation is needed always to know what our "just right" is.  It will not be what Jane next door or Mary across town will need it to be.  It will also not be the same at age 22 or at 42 or at 62.  Finding our "sweet spot" may take time, but is the best place to be to be our best.

Gratitude:

When you listen to the constant barrage of negative attacks at what you need to do and aren't, you begin to lose appreciation for your many amazing accomplishments.  You start to forget that you have gifts and talents and many beautiful parts.  You give in to the feeling that you are lacking.  You move toward feeling that what you are choosing to do right now with your life is nothing and limiting.  Gratitude is the best armor to put on.  When you are thankful for what you can do and be, you have humility to know that there is more, but you have the confidence that in you is greatness still.  You tend to see yourself as blessed with a fulfilling life just as it is, still striving for excellence and setting goals, but content in the knowledge that you are not missing out.

Happiness:

Joy could be used here.  When you are living a balanced life, you reduce the creeping in of unnecessary stress and issues.  You increase peace, success, satisfaction...all those great states of being.  Life will still have it's ups and downs and curve-balls, but you will have happiness to balance those out, to draw on for strength and support.  Don't underestimate the power of being happy...your kids and husband will appreciate it, too.  Happiness provides strength to our armor.  Does that mean we will never feel frustration or sadness?  No, but we will have something to draw from and regain the peace.

Patience:

Delayed gratification is a very difficult skill to master.  There are so many videos out there of an adult tempting a kid with a treat of some kind but asking them to hold off eating it while the adult leaves the room briefly...an eternity to the child.  Learning that something must be "down the road" happens all the time.  Patience makes that okay.  Do we have to have it now?  Will it be any less wonderful later?  Will we be diminished in any way if it is a part of our life in a few years instead of now?  Can we achieve perfection if we don't get a head start?  The world will say yes, yes, yes, no...in that order.  DON'T BELIEVE IT!!!!  You can perfect what you are doing right now.  When it is time to do the other thing, whatever it may be, you will be quite knowledgeable in the previous part of your life, able to guide others just starting.  Similarly, those who have become wise and knowledgeable in the new adventure you are starting will be able to guide you.  It's the omnipotent wisdom of our Father and the order of things that provides us this support net.

Self-Worth:

This is where a testimony of the two scriptures is so important.  You have to believe them and understand them to your core.  You have to be able to stand up tall and say confidently, "I love what I am doing right now.  It's okay if I take on that challenge later, if at all.  I am exactly where I should be, doing what I should be, and being who I am meant to be.  I can become amazing and gifted in this/these things currently in my stewardship and personal world.  One day, I will need to venture into something new, and at that time I will be exactly where I should be, doing what I should be, and will be who I am meant to be.  But, right now...my life is perfect in it's opportunities for stretching and growing and reaching excellence."  If we can boldly declare this with a firm belief, we have given ourselves a most wonderful gift.  We can remove from our thinking that Susan is a CEO, and we are not; that Diane is traveling the world, and we rarely go anywhere other than Grandma's house; that Melissa is just about to finish her Masters and we haven't even earned a Bachelor's Degree yet.  We can see that we are an awesome mother.  We can see that our home is one of protection, faith, love, and controlled chaos (that's premium).  We can see that we are strengthening ourselves in the scriptures, building our relationship with Heavenly Father, and performing our callings as best we can.  We can see that we are doing the best at maintaining and growing a joyful relationship with our spouse.  We can see that our children know how to pray.  We can see that the Lord loves us, guides us, is pleased with our choices.  We can see that we matter, we are making a difference in the lives of others, and that we are experiencing growth and increased wisdom.  We have worth in our hearts.  We can look at our reflection in the mirror and honestly say, "I love you."

Take some time to ponder these scriptures.  Decide now to believe and trust Heavenly Father in those words, and put your life in the order that is right for you and your family.   You will not be disappointed.  I can promise you that!